it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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