lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Randomize
