whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
Randomize