Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
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There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
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Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
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