so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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