Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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