No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
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