After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
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