yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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