My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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