Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
