i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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