Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
