Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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