Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Randomize
