I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
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