I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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