That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
goodnight i made you a song goodbye
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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