You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
Randomize
