Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize