When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Vodka?
Forever.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize