I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
Randomize