u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Randomize
