i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize