11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
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Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
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Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
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