: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
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