I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Randomize
