She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
I enjoy the company of your penis
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