Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
