Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.