Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize