Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
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