Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(831): View more from California

Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777

(323): View more from California

Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)

(831): View more from California

Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.

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(831): Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777 (323): Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;) (831): Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up. http://tfl.nu/bykg

Replies (19) Good night (2034) Bad night (630)
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(828): View more from North Carolina

he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.

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(828): he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art. http://tfl.nu/yesh

Replies (47) Good night (3101) Bad night (1512)
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(678): View more from Georgia

Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.

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(678): Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans. http://tfl.nu/jpyk

Replies (32) Good night (8545) Bad night (888)
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(781): View more from Massachusetts

Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.

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(781): Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him. http://tfl.nu/iiv7

Replies (15) Good night (8132) Bad night (1043)
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(216): View more from Ohio

Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.

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(216): Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was. http://tfl.nu/ift5

Replies (16) Good night (5944) Bad night (936)
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(404): View more from Georgia

I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow

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(404): I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow http://tfl.nu/bfg7

Replies (14) Good night (3252) Bad night (1312)
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(802): View more from Vermont

Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.

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(802): Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good. http://tfl.nu/wigs

Replies (9) Good night (2064) Bad night (3922)
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(513): View more from Ohio

She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"

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(513): She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli" http://tfl.nu/zw4q

Replies (22) Good night (1005) Bad night (4630)
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(414): View more from Wisconsin

Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.

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(414): Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch. http://tfl.nu/js8y

Replies (5) Good night (4651) Bad night (697)
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(479): View more from Arkansas

I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.

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(479): I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast. http://tfl.nu/j7ef

Replies (14) Good night (4693) Bad night (1026)
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(601): View more from Mississippi

I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.

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(601): I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise. http://tfl.nu/o61x

Replies (32) Good night (5455) Bad night (957)
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(863): View more from Florida

I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.

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(863): I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life. http://tfl.nu/jtja

Replies (8) Good night (2609) Bad night (466)
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(513): View more from Ohio

It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again

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(513): It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again http://tfl.nu/339h

Replies (1) Good night (583) Bad night (165)
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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup

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(403): i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup http://tfl.nu/p8ne

Replies (3) Good night (525) Bad night (220)
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(425): View more from Washington

How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE

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(425): How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE http://tfl.nu/8cuk

Replies (9) Good night (712) Bad night (205)

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