My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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