I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
Randomize