I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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