Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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