After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Randomize
