You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Randomize
