she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Randomize
