I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
