So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize