just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
