i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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