Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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