I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
Randomize
