I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
