were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
