Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Randomize