If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
